Comments on: How To Take Part In Japan’s Year-Round Gift Giving Culture

By: Christopher Stilson

Christopher Stilson — Mon, 16 Sep 2013 04:52:00 +0000

Consider me duly corrected.

By: Henro9

Henro9 — Mon, 16 Sep 2013 03:32:00 +0000

You’re applying American cultural values to a non-American cultural practice – sometimes this is ok, but this is something that is fundamentally different. In Asia in general – not just Japan – money is treated very, very differently than it is treated in Euro-American cultures. For example, in most of Asia, giving money to a bride and groom is not just appropriate, it is necessary. In some cultures, parts of Micronesia, for example, it is the main event – people literally pin money to the bride’s dress during a dance often referred to as a money dance. At my own university graduation, my parents went out to a street vendor and picked up a lei made of dollar bills. White people don’t like that kind of crass handling of money, but it is traditional throughout Asia.

So this isn’t really commercialized in any way shape or form. It’s an extension of a near-universal tradition of using money and items of monetary value to express interpersonal relationships. It’s part of a much, much larger tradition – a tradition far, far, far older than our Western concept of “commercialization.”

As for “admiring” their “consideration,” again, you misunderstand a huge point here: Japanese gift-giving is not based on consideration. It is a physical manifestation of the social and interpersonal relationships people share. It has almost nothing whatsoever to do with feelings, emotion, care, friendship. It is entirely built on formalized, structured rituals. People can and do give gifts based on feelings (Valentine’s Day is an example), but the majority of gift-giving is built on formal relationships. You buy presents for people at work because you HAVE to, not because you want to.

Now, does that mean that people haven’t profited from this tradition? Obviously not. Does it mean gifts are never given from the goodness of one’s heart? No. But it saddens me that your comment here is the top-voted comment, because it is based on such a gross misunderstanding of the culture in question.

By: AnadyLi

AnadyLi — Sat, 14 Sep 2013 00:21:00 +0000

China has the same type of thing going on. I’ve done it before at a summer camp before I was even in high school for all of my family/friends in China and and the US! Plus, you’re supposed to refuse not once, not twice, but generally three times or more. Also, don’t open gifts in front of others! And thank them a lot! Also, keep the price tag on: The more expensive the gift, the better. The proof will be that price tag.

By: Henro9

Henro9 — Thu, 12 Sep 2013 23:39:00 +0000

Oh, ok, if it’s a host family, go with a nice bottle of liquor – somewhere over 20 dollars. They’ll be pretty happy with that, especially if it is a local specialty from your home town or region.

By: henro9

henro9 — Thu, 12 Sep 2013 23:34:00 +0000

Oh, ok, a wedding. I know less about wedding traditions, so maybe my advice isn’t enough here. There’s no real such thing as “overkill” here with cliched stereotypes – if everyone brings different maple-flavored products, people will be so, so happy to have the “meibutsu” of your home town. Don’t worry about that.

Since it’s a wedding, there ARE some manners and traditions that can be more difficult, but since you’re talking about a family gathering? Bring some liquor, more liquor, a case of beer, and a huge-ass pile of candy. In my part of Japan, that’s family.

Good luck!

By: Ana

Ana — Thu, 12 Sep 2013 22:44:00 +0000

Really good advice! Thanks a bunch!
I think you’re right how something packed individually is probably the best to pass around.
The only thing was when first asking the question, in mind I was specifically asking about host families and what time of price range to offer as a gift. Your point does come across to all boundaries though, so it was really helpful. This question just came to me as a little bit of curiosity, but I think in the end it’s got to be the thought that counts when finding someone a present.
(´∇ﾉ｀*)ノ