TextFugu In 2014

The million dollar question! I have a little bit of an answer for you, though little-to-no estimate on timelines. Remember when I used to give those? I’ve learned too much since then.

As you know, TextFugu’s getting a big rewrite. A ton is going to change, and it will feel like a very different textbook (don’t worry, those of you who don’t want it to feel like a very different textbook will still have access to the old version for a while). Not only that, but we’re doing our own back-end, front-end, and every other end. That’s the only way I’m able to make the textbook I want to make. Working off somebody else’s back-end just creates limitations. Now we’re doing exactly what we want from the (new) start.

That’s all well and good, but here’s some new information for you. If you were paying really really close attention, I prototyped something up called “EtoEto.” It’s a place where advanced learners can go to listen to and read original materials in Japanese. And, said materials are actually pretty interesting. There are also English translations and some other neat features. Well, the prototype was fun, but we’ll be building this together with TextFugu and creating a “trilogy” of sorts. The idea is that this “trilogy” will get you from zero Japanese to the point where you’re listening and reading Japanese stories / articles, then working your way towards fluency.

And, best part is if you’re a TextFugu Forever member (currently 50% off) you’ll be getting access to all of it. This all isn’t going to be ready anytime too soon, but when it is you’ll be receiving an email to help us test the early version out, or at the very least the ability to sign up for free when it’s done.

That’s about all I have to say about that for now, but it’s progressing forward on both the content and code side of things. I have no idea when it will be fit for human consumption, but I imagine this will be our big thing in 2014, so for all of you who have been sad about lack of TextFugu updates, I hope you’re at least suspiciously interested now.

WaniKani

WaniKani and its 50 levels were finished in 2013. Most likely 2014 will be a slower year for WaniKani (with more time spent on the TextFugu side of things), but I do have some plans for progress here.

We’ll probably move out of the closed beta and into an open one after doing another redesign on the site. With this we’ll be adding some new planned features as well.

On the content side of things, we’ll be moving past level 50 with a focus on (of course) new kanji but also “names vocabulary” that use kanji you’ve learned previously but have really weird pronunciations because they are names and names seem to follow no rules. Basically, level 50+ content should be arriving this year, though at a slower pace since we finished the initially planned 50 levels.

Nothing too mind shattering on the WaniKani side, but certainly there will be a few rustles in the bushes here.

Videos and TofuguTV

After basically taking a year off, we’re planning (for the umpteenth time) to get back into video making. We did a little bit of playing around here at the end of the year, but will be really getting into it probably here in mid-January. We’ll be working on regular videos shot here in the office as well as videos from our trip we took almost a year ago to a ton of weird Japanese places you’ve probably never heard of. I’m looking forward to this a lot, and our recent new hires will help.

New Hires

We’ve also made a few hires for 2014!

• Mami – she was basically full time, but now it’s official. She’ll be doing much the same as what she was doing before (writing, posting, recording, helping, eating Canadian bacon, etc), but I’m looking forward to some exclusive and new Mami things in 2014.
• James – this is our first video hire. His background is in special effects and After Effects, though he has done editing too. He’ll be working on our trip video for our TofuguTV series in 2014. I’m sure his special effects touches will be seen in regular videos as well.
• Cristina – our other first video hire! Cristina will be helping with regular videos and day to day social media stuff. I’m sure you’ll see her around a lot, because when she’s not making videos she’ll be in them.
• A Buncha Writers – you may have noticed this. We hired a lot of new writers. Right now they’re getting used to things and some people are being tested out, but it’s been really nice to have more perspectives and people who can write things I have no business writing. I expect a lot of great reads from them this year!

We’re growing the pirate crew slowly but surely. I’m excited to see what the new people can do and I hope it means a lot of new things. Speaking of new things…

New Things?

I can’t tell you my secrets, and I can’t tell you what we’ll actually end up doing, but here are some fun things we may end up doing in 2014. Note, who knows if we will actually be doing any of these things, and who knows what other things not on this list will happen. I don’t!

• Tshirts (could it be??)
• Ebooks (I have a couple of ideas, but I’m hoping someone else will write them because I don’t have time!!)
• Documentaries (we have some ideas… but should finish some of the footage from the last trip first)
• Katakana42 (the companion to Hiragana42)
• Office doge (wow. so dog.)

That’s just off the top of my head. Deeper inside are more secret ideas that I can’t tell you right now. So, too bad for you!

If you have any questions about new things or old things or in-between things be sure to ask about them in the comments below. Maybe I’ll answer some of them if you ask nicely ;)

Oh, and tomorrow’s post is going to be so cool. Going to give you the coolest thing we’ve ever done since DatingMakura.

Before we go on a short break for the 4th of July holiday, I wanted to relay some changes happening on Tofugu effective today.

First, Hashi will be leaving his post as Editor to move on to other things. We’ll certainly all miss his posts and editing services, so let’s all thank him for the time he’s put into shaping Tofugu into what it is today! (Thank you)

For the time being I’ll be taking over the editing duties and will be making a few changes.

1. There will be no more Saturday and Sunday posts, at least for now. There’s a couple of reasons for this. First, while I realize there are a few die-hard fans of the Saturday Timewaster and Sunday News series, there just wasn’t enough people reading them to continue writing them (especially while we have a shorter writing staff right now). Second, it means our illustrator Aya can have a little bit of weekend time to herself for once :p
2. Going to focus on quality and depth for posts. Harkens back to point #1. I want to focus efforts on fewer posts of higher quality. We’re still planning to write five posts a week, though. So don’t worry, you’ll get your fill. Most likely you’ll be seeing longer posts during the week and then a lot of the shorter posts showing up in the newsletter.

That should be about it for now. Thanks so much for being such awesome readers. We’ll see you back here on Monday! Have a great holiday even if it’s not a holiday for you.

<3
Koichi

Hatsune Miku Crumbles Under Weight of Own Head, Injures Bystander: It was only a matter of time before those large-headed anime characters hurt somebody; and this past week, a snow sculpture of vocaloid character Hatsune Miku imploded under the weight of its own hubris. Didn’t I warn you, Japan?! You flew too close to the sun! [via Crunchy Roll and Ayashii World]

Tim Wilson, jailed in Japan for Cheeba Chews, reportedly to be released: Remember my post a few months ago about drugs in Japan? The American medical marijuana patient I mentioned who was arrested in Japan is apparently set to be released soon, after being in jail since November. In Japan, drugs are serious business. [via News on Japan]

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[threecol_one_last]On Finding a Rubbish Bin in Japan: One of my favorite Japan blogs, This Japanese Life, takes a look at how a doomsday cult influenced Japan’s garbage cans. Sounds strange, but it makes more sense than you might think. [via This Japanese Life]

Fake rhino attempts zoo escape: In an emergency drill, employees of the Tokyo Zoo dressed up as a rhino while the rest of staff tried to catch them. Is the drill realistic? Not very. Hilarious? Absolutely. [via the BBC]
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How Japan, US may break 18-year deadlock over Okinawa base: United States military bases on Okinawa have been a hot-button issue between the US and Japan for decades now, but with an agreement to move troops from Okinawa to Guam, it looks like the two countries are closer and closer to resolution. [via News on Japan]

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Unusual rise in piano sales linked to earthquake: The 3/11 disaster had a lot of unexpected consequences, but I don’t think that anybody could have predicted that it would drive so many people to run out and buy new pianos. Go figure. [via Reddit]

Cuisine targeted for UNESCO list: UNESCO, the UN foundation for culture, has started compiling a list of cultural treasures all over the world that should be preserved and protected. Among them is Japanese cuisine; so for all of you who worry that future generations won’t know the joy of soba, fear not! The UN has got you covered. [via News On Japan]

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Bullying rose 6.7% in 2010 school year: Bullying has historically been a pretty big problem in Japanese schools, but in recent years the Japanese have arguably become better at recognizing and stopping bullying. Some of that progress was apparently reversed in 2010, as bullying saw its first rise in several years. What gives? [via The Japan Times]

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Japan’s older generation turns gamers: As if you didn’t know that Japan is full of gamers already, CNN put a spotlight on the growing number of seniors making the trip to the local arcade. With Japan’s population aging, it only makes sense to transform the elderly into Street Fighter champions and DDR masters. [via CNN]

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That covers all the news for this week. Did I miss anything? What did you think of the new format? Please let me know in the comments!

Every week we gather up all the Japanese news that other people have written about and put it here, in our “Sunday News” column. Although this news may not be the hardest hitting news out there, it’ll give you a sense of all the weird things happening in Japan, and I’m sure we can all agree, Japan is great for weird news. Enjoy!

The KFC Double Down Invades Japan!: In case you’re unfamiliar with the infamous KFC Double Down, it’s the culinary equivalent of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. It’s as if a KFC executive saw the Tracy Jordan Meat Machine from 30 Rock and through that it was a good idea. And now we’re exporting this blight on humanity to Japan? God help us all. [via Crunchyroll]

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Japanese man swims palace moat ‘to meet emperor’: As crazy as a Japanese guy swimming over to meet the emperor sounds, it still can’t beat what happened in 2008, when a British guy skinny dipped in the moat around the imperial palace. Is that all you got, Japan? Looks like gaijin are still crazier. Next time, bring your “A” game. [via Reddit]

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What you wish your Japanese boyfriend/girlfriend would quit doing: Yet again, What Japan Thinks shines some light on the Japanese mind with this poll about what annoys your Japanese significant other. The most surprising result for me? Japanese men hate it when their girlfriends want to go out for ramen. Sorry Japanese dudes, but you don’t know how good you’ve got it. [via What Japan Thinks]

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VIDEO: “Eternal Sunshine” Director’s Japanese Commercial is as Weird as You’d Expect: If you’ve ever seen any of Michel Gondry’s movies – like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind or The Science of Sleep – then you know how weird of a guy he can be. So it shouldn’t be any surprise that his newest Japanese commercial is just plain strange (but hilarious). [via Crunchroll]

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Review – A Brutally Honest Take on “Hi! My Name is Loco and I am a Racist” by Baye McNeil: Japan blogger Loco of Loco in Yokohama recently put out an eBook about his experiences in Japan. Our good pal recently read through it and detailed his (sometimes emotional) response to it. Not being a huge eBook reader myself, I’m waiting for the physical copy to come out. [via Hikosaemon]

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Nintendo bets on Wii U to reverse profit slide: Time have been rough for Nintendo recently with the apparent failure of its newest handheld, the 3DS. Could this be the end of the once-great game giant? Only time, and the Taiwanese animated news, will tell.

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That’s it for this week in news. Did I miss an important story from this week? Let me know in the comments!

P.S. Double Down look appetizing to you? Follow us on Twitter.
P.P.S. Rather grab something from a Japanese fast food place? Check us out on Facebook or Google+.

Over the years, The Onion has done a good number of stories on Japan-related things. These are the best of the best (in my opinion) Japan-related stories that The Onion has put up to date.

Asian Teen Has Sweaty Middle-Aged-Man Fetish

One of the things the Onion does a great job at is “opposites” humor. They write a story that is the exact opposite of what you’d expect in order to create a hilarious situation. In this case, they’ve taken the normal “Japanese Schoolgirl Fetish” and flipped that on its head. Look at those sexy middle-aged white male pictures on her wall. Mmm mmm.

AOMORI, JAPAN—At first glance, 17-year-old Misaki Nakajima seems like any other shy and submissive Japanese schoolgirl. She loves shopping, text messaging, and the color pink. But beneath her wholesome exterior lies a wicked secret: Misaki Nakajima is consumed by sexual fantasies involving sweaty, middle-aged American men.

I think this paragraph sums it up pretty well though… well, sums up the opposite pretty well:

It’s not uncommon for Asian girls to be fascinated with these types of men,” said Dr. Yasuhara, who found in a recent survey that three out of 10 Japanese teenage girls list Paul Giamatti as the most attractive American celebrity. “And it’s easy to see why. Sweaty, forty-something Caucasians represent the epitome of mystery and wonder to Asian teens.

Read This Story →

Japanese Exchange Student Taken To Japanese Restaurant

I think this happens a lot. I don’t know why, but it does. I suppose people want to show their Japanese exchange student how Japanese they really can be (answer is, not very much).

The Eagle [Food Center] has take-out sushi, but I didn’t think there was a place you could sit down for a genuine Japanese meal,” Tucker said Monday. “But as I was reading the paper Sunday, I happened to notice an ad for Edo. I knew Takashi would be so thrilled.

But, if you take your Japanese exchange student out to Japanese food, even if it’s particularly authentic (usually it’s not), you’re basically doing something like this:

The outing marked the first time any of the Tuckers had eaten Japanese food and Miyazawa’s 18,358th.

Seriously. Japanese people just want to eat hamburgers. Go take them to eat hamburgers.

Read This Story →

Obama Earns Money For U.S. By Appearing In Japanese Television Commercial

I think this post is more something that makes me nostalgic, more than anything. The image above comes from this series of commercials:

[yframe url='http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=soRcECd_fLI']

The article is pretty funny too. Japanese commercials pay out the big bucks when it comes to getting some star talent (compared to America), which is why there are so many American Celebrities doing Japanese commercials.

Representatives for Ezaki Glico confirmed this week that the visually opulent ad will feature the president wearing swim trunks and relaxing with a group of young Japanese male friends by the side of an animated swimming pool filled with melted cheese and ham.

Totally sounds like a Japanese commercial to me.

Read The Rest →

Earthquake Sets Japan Back To 2147

Sometimes the Onion isn’t known for it’s sensitivity on subjects, and this is probably one of those times.

Japanese government officials confirmed Monday that the damage wrought on Japan’s national infrastructure by the July 16th earthquake—particularly on the country’s protective force field, quantum teleportation system, zero-point fusion energy broadcasting grid, and psychodynamic communications network—was severe enough to set the technologically advanced island nation back approximately 300 years to a primitive mid-22nd-century state of existence.

Japan’s pretty well known for being kind of futuristic. I mean, they are the world’s number one producer of evil robots, after all. The Onion does a good job taking advantage of the stereotype that Japan is in the future and everyone else is in the past. My favorite part was how they hinted that a 92 year old Japanese person is young.

The older generations can talk all they want about the virtues of eating meals in pill form and taking the moving sidewalk instead of the wormhole, but this is just plain deprivation, and it sucks,” Shunji, 92, said. “It doesn’t help that recovery efforts have been so slow. Why is it taking so long for officials to reconnect something as basic as the Neural Net?

Japanese people live for a pretty long time, I suppose.

Read This Story →

David Ortiz Plays Games In Japan Wearing Camera, Fanny Pack

If you’ve ever seen a group of middle-aged Japanese tourists, then this headline is enough said.

Read This Story →

Game Shows Now No. 1 Cause Of Death In Japan

Gotta love Onion Radio News. Also gotta love all the hilarious Japanese game shows. Plenty of Japanese game shows seem pretty scary, and sometimes kind of deadly, so this radio piece takes advantage of that. Kind of reminds me of something else with Chris Farley.

Read This Story →

Japanese Leaders Say Radioactive Waste May Have Contributed To Creation Of Giant Monsters

Oh, you think, Japan?

TOKYO—Japanese prime minister Ryutaro Hashimoto announced Tuesday that radioactive waste recently discovered in Japan’s Nihon prefecture may have contributed to the development of kaiju—translated as “strange, mysterious beast-animal supernatural giant warrior-monsters”—whose many battles have wreaked havoc throughout the Western world and Japan since the late 1950s.

Wouldn’t be a Tofugu post without some kind of monster reference.

Read This Story →

Ichiro: ‘The Best Part About Playing For My Country Was Not Playing For The Seattle Mariners’

Poor, poor Ichiro. Also, poor, poor Mariners.

In an interview following Japan’s 10-6 victory against Cuba in the World Baseball Classic championship game Monday, Ichiro Suzuki called the tournament a “great opportunity to represent anything besides the Seattle Mariners.”

And…

Playing alongside my countrymen on the world stage was nice, but the highlight of the event for me was not having to watch helplessly from the on-deck circle as [Seattle outfielder] Willie Bloomquist pops out for the fourth time in one game

Ouch and double ouch.

Read This Story →

Kobayashi Retires From Eating

Tofugu’s covered Kobayashi a couple times – we kind of like him. Unfortunately, he keeps losing to his rival and keeps having trouble with the federation that lets people do eating contests (i.e. he can’t be a part of both of them, because the people in charge are idiots).

I suppose he just couldn’t take it anymore and decided it was time to retire.

I used to eat because I wanted to, but lately it seems like I only do it because I feel like I have to,” added Kobayashi, who claims that he was in the middle of eating his 52nd barbecue chicken wing last week when he realized he no longer possessed the same hunger he did earlier in his career. “I knew it was time to step aside and give others the chance to eat.

We obviously wish the best to Kobayashi during his fake retirement.

Read This Story →

More Japan-Articles On The Onion

There are plenty more Japan-related articles on The Onion, and I’m sure many of them are awesome. Definitely let us know in the comments if you see anything awesomer than the ones above, though I think that’ll be tough to do (luckily humor depends on the recipient!).

P.S. Think that the Onion is more fact than fiction? Follow us on Twitter.
P.P.S. Other Onion posts hit too close to home? Like us on Facebook.

The Best Jerry, the Best! (anyone catch this reference, or am I old?)

At Tofugu, we don’t do a very good job keeping you up to date on Japanese news. In fact, we do a pretty horrid job, because that’s not really our niche (though it’s hard to pass up the occasional fun story). There are a few sites that thankfully do a good job at keeping up with Japanese news, but they tend to be overflowing with content and it’s hard to keep up, even for an RSS guru like myself. That’s why I love JapanSoc, and you should to.

JapanSoc is a lot like Digg, except it’s only for Japan-related things. Better than Digg, it has a great (friendly) community, it focuses on a specific niche (Japan), and works really really well. Whenever I want to know what’s going on in Japan (and only want to know the interesting / important things), this is where I go – otherwise there’s just too much noise, and I can’t keep up!

Click on this image to see it biiigggg

Of course, if you’re only interested in a certain aspect of Japan, JapanSoc’s got you covered there as well. There are different categories that allow you to follow certain things (like language learning, otaku culture, business, news, etc), which makes it even more useful to those of you that only want to see what’s important to you, and you alone.

Though, I gotta say, my favorite feature is the rankings. By Soc’ing things, friending people, and being a part of the community, you get points, which translate to sumo rankings. Sumo rankings. Right now I’m a Jonokuchi, which basically translates to small fry… but I will rise through the ranks, just wait and see, just wait and see. Come friend me and we’ll sumo it out geek-style. It’s on, Donkey Kong.

Anyways, big props to JapanSoc for making my Japanese news reading life simple and easy. Go give them an RSS subscribe too, if you swing that way. Oh, and if you stumble across this post in Japan Soc, give it a Soc (a point)! Don’t forget to Soc all the other cool news you see, too, to help good things get to the front page, otherwise I won’t know what to read!